Archive for July, 2010

Jul-23-10

Frustration and Forgiveness

posted by mrsnunar

Colossians 3:13

“Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

This verse hit me like a ton of truthful bricks today. I’ve been having difficulty coming home from vacation and living with my two daughters (8 and 2 years old). It’s been hot. They’ve been fighting and screaming. The 2-year-old is getting into everything forcing me to re-babyproof the entire house when all I want to do is go lie down. I’ve been worrying about depression, anxiety about school starting soon, and how I’m not going to get anything done around here. Then there’s the guilt I have with them sitting in front of TV during the summer for hours because we don’t have a safe yard for them to play in or friends in the neighborhood their age. Am I a hateful neglecting mother? Am I selfish for not wanting to be around them? It’s a Friday and all I want to do is escape back to when I had the grandparents to watch and coddle them so I could have my 2 hour naps and feel like I didn’t have to own so much responsibility anymore. Then reality hits.

I read this verse on Facebook today as I gave up trying to nap and yell at the kids to be quiet. It stunned me that it spoke just to me at his moment. God is here. He knows what is going on. He’s telling me to “just deal”.  Forgiveness is a tough thing, cliched, I know, but true. I called my oldest daughter in to talk one on one instead of yelling. I asked her for help and shared this verse with her. I asked her if she could forgive her sister for being 2 and getting into her stuff. I asked her to forgive me for being cranky. Then I told her I forgave her and sissy for making me upset. They were doing their job as siblings with a little rivalry there, just a little loud. I forgave her for not knowing what to do when I sent her mixed messages about not bothering me and expecting her to parent her sister at 8 years old, then yelling when she was trying to count her screaming sister and put her in time-out.  “Bear with each other..” This will have to be the mantra for the coming weeks as we are out of money for camps and it will be the three of us in the house until August 13. It is so easy to see God in the beautiful mountains of Colorado, but He is here too. He is watching and forgiving.

Here’s part of a Third Day song I liked as I was coming down the mountain today:

When I climb down the mountain
And get back to my life
I won’t settle for ordinary things
I’m gonna follow You forever
And for all of my days
I won’t rest ’til I see You again

Share
Tags: